User:Ch4zm/June 2025/Alewife Lore Jam

original

The AA.png Alewife Arsonists are a Golly team from the Alewife Metro Station in the Alewife district of Cambridge, a neighborhood of Boston, Massachusetts. Unsurprisingly, the Alewife Arsonists are big fans of setting things on fire in any way possible - be it a classic Molotov Cocktail or a flamethrower attached to a drone.

In Season 14 the Alewife Arsonists were shocked to discover that their cross-town rivals the BB.png Boylston Boogers were joining the Golly league, replacing the ATL.png Atlanta Glitter Sharks . The Arsonists and Boogers have been frenemies since childhood, and compete each year for the MTA Crown.

ideas

• The Commuter Rage Gestalt: The Arsonists are not a team of individuals, but a single, psychic entity formed from the collective, incandescent rage of every commuter who has ever been screwed over by a Red Line delay at Alewife. Their slogan, "Burn it down!", is a literal echo of a million muttered curses. Their cellular patterns are fueled by pure, unadulterated frustration, making them erratic, aggressive, and prone to explosive, often self-destructive, final generations.

• Guardians of the Primordial Burn: Deep beneath Alewife's concrete labyrinth, in a forgotten maintenance shaft, lies the "Pilot Light of the Commonwealth," a primordial, sentient flame that has burned since before the city was founded. The Arsonists are its chosen keepers. For them, games are not sport, but ritual combat. A victory feeds and brightens the Flame; a loss causes it to dim, and if it ever goes out, all of Boston will be plunged into an era of cosmic indifference and lukewarm clam chowder.

• Embodied Driving Habits: The Arsonists are the metaphysical embodiment of every driver who has ever navigated the Fresh Pond Rotary right outside the station. Their automata follow no logical rules of engagement. They will cut off opponents without warning, execute blatantly illegal "moves" that defy the game's physics, and treat every single match like a blood feud over the last parking spot at Market Basket. Their patterns are chaos made manifest.

improvements

Commuter connection