User:Ch4zm/December 2022/Golly Lore Fragments
Pattern
Fragments Pattern for Lore
Write the text once in a template, and include it on relevant pages.
Example: {{PianoTunersHackingScandalFragment}}
Fragments Wrtiting Procedure
Procedure:
- narratives are for linking teams together, generally
- write narrative out on respective team's page. just write.
- once it is roughly done, split whole thing into one or more lore fragments
- maintain a master list of the lore fragments
- once finished turning it into templates on the original page, include the templates on other relevant pages
Tag all fragments with:
Tag with relevant cup:
Category:Hellmouth Cup Lore, Category:Toroidal Cup Lore, etc.
Tag with relevant teams, details, etc:
Category:Midwest Love Triangle
All included at end between "noinclude" tags"
SS
Rainbow
narrowly missed a flawless dynasty under extraordinarily difficult circumstances
spoiled by SGE - photobombed
SAC
Hellmouth Cup
Season 4/Sacramento Boot Lickers Bankruptcy -> {{BootLickersSeason4BankruptcySummaryFragment}}
Season 4:
- Season 4 Day 25 game against DET - one point
- Transformed themselves into the team of destiny
- Origin of team slogans that are nonsensical self-help mumbo jumbo
- Visualize Your Power!
- Transmogrify Your Self Manifestation!
- (scrolling tickers)
{{BootLickersVisualizeYourPower}}
OSHA
Hellmouth Cup
The Curse of the Silly Goat refers to a curse that affected the Jersey OSHA Violations for the first 48 seasons of their existence, the entirety of the Hellmouth Cup and Toroidal Cup.
The Jersey OSHA Violations stadium was built on the site of a former petting zoo. The main attraction at the former petting zoo was a theoretical, non-Euclidean goat, which was purely conceptual. However, when the petting zoo was shut down, the goat was never set loose, and when the stadium was built on the site, the perturbed non-Euclidean goat spirit began to cause "goat in the machine" glitches during matches. These tended to strike the OSHA Violations at their most crucial moments, creating a long string of heartbreaks.
The curse was finally broken in Rainbow/Season 1, for reasons that are still poorly understood.
Curse removal theories include:
- The Möbius Fence: A 14-year-old fan of both the OSHA Violations and the philosopher Martin Heidegger published a research paper with a mathematical proof that a "conceptual goat" could be pacified by the "concept" of a three-sided fence. During Rainbow Cup postseason matches at the OSHA Violations stadium, several fans positioned themselves at mathematically precise focal points around the arena. One fan held a sign saying "This is one side of the fence." The second held up another sign that said "This is the second side of the fence." The third held up a sign that said "This is the final side of the fence." The conceptual fence, which may have been missing a side, or may have had an extra side, trapped the conceptual "goat in the machine" in the machine, and the paradox rendered it unable to interfere with matches, allowing the OSHA Violations to finally win.
- Goat's Goodbye: Spotting an opportunity to break the curse early in Season 1 of the Rainbow Cup, the team hired a Goat Trainer to work with the non-Euclidean goat and develop several "trick plays" that would utilize the goat. It is speculated that the OSHA Violations practiced these trick plays repeatedly throughout the season, all while maintaining a protocol of absolute secrecy. In the final seconds of the final match of the Rainbow Cup series, the OSHA Violations attempted to execute their trick play to outmaneuver the
Mobile Wheels
, which would have failed because the haunted spirit of the non-Euclidean silly goat had disappeared sometime during the final match, except the OSHA Violations executed it incorrectly, which caused the trick play to succeed. Commotion broke out on the grid, and when the dust had settled, the OSHA Violations had clinched the Rainbow Cup by a single Rainbow. - Curse of the Silly Goat
Jersey Courage refers to courage gained from intoxication with alcohol. The term stems from the 
Jersey OSHA Violations
tradition of getting smashed, hammered, blitzed, sloshed, stewed, and three sheets to the wind before every playoffs game. (Often contrasted with Seattle Courage.) - Jersey Courage
DECO OSHA alliance?
