Detroit Grape Chews/Century of Failure
Main: Detroit Grape Chews
Hellmouth II/Season 4 marked the 100th season in which the 
Detroit Grape Chews
have failed to clinch a Hot League pennant or reach their first-ever Cup game:
- Hellmouth Cup: 24 seasons of pennant-free performance by Detroit (24 total)
- Toroidal Cup: 24 seasons of pennant-free performance by Detroit (48 total)
- Rainbow Cup: 24 seasons of pennant-free performance by Detroit (72 total)
- Klein Cup: 24 seasons of pennant-free performance by Detroit (96 total)
- Hellmouth II Cup: 4 (and counting) seasons of pennant-free performance by Detroit (100 total)
True to form, the Grape Chews finished strong during the regular season (Hellmouth II/Season 4), and made it to the postseason - hooray for consistent regular season performance by the Grape Chews!
The Grape Chews overpowered the 
Boylston Boogers
in the Division Series, beating them just as they have beaten countless other opponents in countless other Hot League Division Series. (Except the Klein Cup, yikes.)
Soon after, the Grape Chews found themselves in the Hot League Championship Series, with the franchise facing 100 seasons without ever clinching a Hot League Pennant.
- "Here is our chance," they thought. "Surely, we won't fail this time," they said to themselves. "What are the odds we pooch it 100 times in a row?" they pondered, alone to themselves, when the locker room was empty.
- The Detroit Grape Chews fought valiantly with he Jersey OSHA Violations: tooth and nail fist to face, eye for an eye.
- The Grape Chews managed to tie up the series, 3-3.
Here we go: it all came down to Game 7 (
64276ed7-86e4-48fb-9120-663c286025e2).
In Game 7, The Chews performed pitifully. Over the course of nearly 3,000 generations, there was never a doubt as to which team was in control (the OSHA Violations) and which team was the tiny excited clueless puppy dog running into the wall (Detroit). The Chews trailed the OSHA Violations for the entire match, thus sealing the fate of the Hellmouth II/Season 4 Detroit Grape Chews
as the saddest team in Golly history. (Sorry to be the bearer of bad Chews, Detroit.)
| Season 4 Hot League Championship Series Results Table | |||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
 Jersey OSHA Violations
vs. Detroit Grape Chews
| |||||||
| Winner | W Score | Margin | L Score | Loser | Generations | Link | |
| Game 1 | Jersey OSHA Violations | 432 | 66.90% | 143 | Detroit Grape Chews | 3,773 | 1398fc4e-e3e5-4f13-80ea-21cd41fb995c
|
| Game 2 | Detroit Grape Chews | 480 | 66.67% | 160 | Jersey OSHA Violations | 3,708 | 462f84cd-f29b-42f6-bc72-b9ace74ca558
|
| Game 3 | Detroit Grape Chews | 281 | 16.01% | 236 | Jersey OSHA Violations | 2,878 | 49464e3d-cdec-474e-ad63-5aab030a322a
|
| Game 4 | Jersey OSHA Violations | 327 | 52.29% | 156 | Detroit Grape Chews | 5,671 | c087aa9c-daa9-4fa0-8b98-ae69122b5510
|
| Game 5 | Jersey OSHA Violations | 270 | 34.44% | 177 | Detroit Grape Chews | 5,527 | ae99c297-6f11-4b8f-8bcd-70d8d87f66ea
|
| Game 6 | Detroit Grape Chews | 321 | 25.55% | 239 | Jersey OSHA Violations | 5,245 | 3022da02-5d60-4d84-985e-b477174c99e2
|
| Game 7 | Jersey OSHA Violations | 303 | 12.87% | 264 | Detroit Grape Chews | 2,895 | 64276ed7-86e4-48fb-9120-663c286025e2
|
More details: Hellmouth II/Season 4/Postseason#Hot League Championship Series: OSHA vs DET
