Template:HellmouthPianoTunersIcarusProtocolFragment
If Season 15 was a heist, Season 17 was an ascent into the sun. The Piano Tuners, drunk on their own inexplicable success, played recklessly. They were no longer just out to win it, they were looking to push the simulator to the limits of functionality, hunting for exploits that they could use to get a leg up.
Salt in the Wound
The Season 17 LDS rematch between the
and the
was less a series and more a bullying session. The Birds, still psychologically scarred from the Season 15 Two-Point Eye Poke, tried to play conservatively. The Tuners responded by intentionally mimicking the Birds' own oscillation patterns, but playing them slightly off-key. It drove the Long Beach collective insane. The 3-0 sweep was a mercy killing; the Birds spent most of the series trying to debug their own sensors rather than playing the game.
| Season 17 Cold League Division Series Results Table | |||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Error creating thumbnail: File missing Ft. Worth Piano Tuners
vs. Error creating thumbnail: File missing Long Beach Flightless Birds
| |||||||
| Winner | W Score | Margin | L Score | Loser | Generations | Link | |
| Game 1 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 251 | 45.02% | 138 | Long Beach Flightless Birds | 1,542 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing cb7bcade-eb31-48de-b886-f4778d782163
|
| Game 2 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 179 | 13.41% | 155 | Long Beach Flightless Birds | 1,984 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing e15ca0c6-aa98-467c-941c-505c934d8e18
|
| Game 3 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 142 | 21.13% | 112 | Long Beach Flightless Birds | 3,858 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing 2b2c435b-e1a5-4a36-b004-1bbc7d44cae8
|
The Reactor Leak Gambit
In the Cold League Championship Series, the
faced off against the
. The Piano Tuners gained a quick 2 games to none lead, and saw a chance to put their foot to the gas. They executed a maneuver called the Reactor Leak Gambit - a dangerous maneuver that intentionally destabilized their own core formation, creating cascading failures that filled the grid with debris and destabilized the simulator. It was statistical suicide - even the OSHA Violations, who are famous for flagrant safety violations and insane risk taking, and whose motto is "Safety Third," were quoted afterwards as saying it was a "totally insane and reckless risk that we would never have taken." The Piano Tuners executed the maneuver perfectly, bombarded the Violations, and clawed their way back from the dead, securing a 4-point victory and a sweep. The OSHA Violations were left traumatized and wondering whether they had just lost their title of biggest risk-takers in Golly.
| Season 17 Cold League Championship Series Results Table | |||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Error creating thumbnail: File missing Ft. Worth Piano Tuners
vs. Error creating thumbnail: File missing Jersey OSHA Violations
| |||||||
| Winner | W Score | Margin | L Score | Loser | Generations | Link | |
| Game 1 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 141 | 64.54% | 50 | Jersey OSHA Violations | 1,955 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing 6039b1b0-d5d1-4be8-b45a-61b54b9e37de
|
| Game 2 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 74 | 35.14% | 48 | Jersey OSHA Violations | 1,045 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing dd556fc5-6d8d-425e-a687-e89f3314119a
|
| Game 3 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 123 | 3.25% | 119 | Jersey OSHA Violations | 3,036 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing 26e3992e-7108-43d9-bc11-c472b6fb03d7
|
The Hostile Takeover
The Season 17 Hellmouth Cup series between the
and the
was a clash of dissonant, musical chaos versus market-driven, mass-psychology chaos. The Business Majors, whose behavior was difficult to predict but considered ruthlessly efficient, carefully outmaneuvered the Piano Tuners to build up a 3-1 lead in the series. Just like Season 11, the Piano Tuners, facing elimination, turned nasty and fought like rats, including a narrow 8-point margin of victory in a chaotic Game 6.
In Game 7, to the massive relief of the entire league, the Business Majors implemented a formation called the Hostile Takeover, a risky and very expensive maneuver that was tailor-made for this type of end-of-the-line, Game 7 situation. They isolated the Tuners' frequencies, filtered them out, packaged them up, and sold them off. The Tuners quickly fell behind, and had no more tricks up their sleeve, no more last-minute gambits. The 177-111 victory by the Business Majors was considered a triumph for the entire league. And in some sense, it led the Piano Tuners to their downfall - the loss forced the Piano Tuners collective to consider "alternative victory techniques" by rigging random number generators in collusion with the Corporate Shells, which would set in motion the entire sordid affair of the Piano Tuners Hacking Scandal, the Cancel Texas Memo, and the Baltimore Diaspora.
| Season 17 - Hellmouth Cup Results Table | |||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Error creating thumbnail: File missing Orlando Business Majors
vs. Error creating thumbnail: File missing Ft. Worth Piano Tuners
| |||||||
| Winner | W Score | Margin | L Score | Loser | Generations | Link | |
| Game 1 | Orlando Business Majors | 144 | 7.64% | 133 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 1,105 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing 4b906527-a96c-4de4-82a0-e00fe05bf43d
|
| Game 2 | Orlando Business Majors | 281 | 96.44% | 10 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 1,188 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing 2dcc8524-5445-4c96-b470-a22df05f0aca
|
| Game 3 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 185 | 55.14% | 83 | Orlando Business Majors | 1,563 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing c22c53b8-dd0d-4867-9590-920e21a099c4
|
| Game 4 | Orlando Business Majors | 240 | 73.75% | 63 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 3,231 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing fd362da4-1788-4b1d-a863-1f5daa2792a9
|
| Game 5 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 202 | 35.15% | 131 | Orlando Business Majors | 2,519 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing 9d05420c-edf2-4d1e-97b5-691d77d0791e
|
| Game 6 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 165 | 4.85% | 157 | Orlando Business Majors | 1,575 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing a379aaca-6653-4224-988b-3319d8af2baa
|
| Game 7 | Orlando Business Majors | 177 | 37.29% | 111 | Ft. Worth Piano Tuners | 1,613 | Error creating thumbnail: File missing 8b1ac131-091f-4842-8250-1b0ed5302f2b
|
