Difference between revisions of "Ten Ten"

Revision as of 01:07, 30 December 2022

Ten Ten is an annual holiday occurring on October 10. The purpose of the holiday is for teams that have not yet been incinerated to celebrate being un-incinerated. The holiday occurs on October 10 to commemorate the incineration of the Baltimore Texas , which occurred at the end of Toroidal/Season 20.

Accidental Premature Incineration

During Toroidal/Season 20, the Commissioner released the Cancel Texas Memo, which signaled the Commissioner's intention to incinerate the Baltimore Texas at the end of the season. The City of Baltimore made plans for an elaborate yet tasteful incineration ceremony, to take place in Baltimore at The Alamo, with the Commissioner presiding, and with close family and loyal fans present to be with the Texas in their final moments.

Before the ceremony began, however, the Texas were incinerated when the Commissioner accidentally sat on the incineration button, which was in a back pocket, and the entire Baltimore Texas team was instantly incinerated, to everyone's surprise. Baltimore was horrified; the blunder made the front cover of major Baltimore newspapers, and the public called for the Commissioner to be held accountable.

Ten Ten Holiday

In an attempt to distract from news of the accidental premature incineration of the Baltimore Texas in front of family and fans, the Commissioner's Office rapidly put together a press briefing in which they announced a new holiday, to occur each October 10, the date of the incineration of the Baltimore Texas. The Commissioner dubbed the holiday "Ten Ten". The Commissioner further stated that the holiday was for non-incinerated teams only, and would be a "decadent feast day" that would be a "celebration of Life, winning, and being un-incinerated."

Baltimore Declares War

Template:BaltimoreDeclaresWarFragment

Declaration of War

Main: Baltimore War

After spending one unbearable season booing the Baltimore Piano Tuners relentlessly at every home game, the city of Baltimore was still waiting for closure around the incineration of the Texas that simply never came. Everyone in the city was bitter about how things had ended with the Texas, and angry with the Commissioner for the insults and for sticking them with the Piano Tuners, who were not only their bitter rivals, but a pack of cheats to boot.

At the conclusion of Toroidal/Season 21, fans of the late beloved Baltimore Texas banded together to petition the City of Baltimore to declare war on the Commissioner of Golly. People poured into the streets to show solidarity for the Texas and back the call for war, which had become known as the Baltimore War before it had even been declared.

Bowing to relentless public pressure, ignoring the advice of lawyers who pointed out the dubious nature of declaring war on a Commissioner, the City issued a declaration of war on the Commissioner at the conclusion of Toroidal/Season 21, starting the Baltimore War.

The declaration of war was later expanded to include both the Commissioner of Golly and the Baltimore Piano Tuners .

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 {{TenTenAccidentalPrematureIncinerationFragment}}
-==Establishment of Ten Ten==
+==Ten Ten Holiday==
-In an attempt to make up for the mistake of accidentally and prematurely incinerating the Baltimore Texas in front of family and fans, the Commissioner announced a new "Ten Ten" holiday would take place annually on October 10. However, the Commissioner heaped further insult on Baltimore by announcing that the October 10 "Ten Ten" holiday would be for non-incinerated teams only, and would be a "decadent feast day for celebrating Life, winning, and being un-incinerated."
+{{TenTenHolidayEstablishmentFragment}}
-Baltimore fans were angry that "Ten Ten" would not be a solemn holiday to commemorate the Baltimore Texas, but instead would be a celebration of everything the Baltimore Texas weren't - being alive, being winners, and being un-incinerated.
+==Baltimore Declares War==
-The Mayor of Baltimore officially declared the Commissioner of Golly ''persona non grata'' within the city limits, and residents of Baltimore city-wide began a Beef Campaign to start Beef with the Commissioner. A Beef Parade was organized, in which effigies of the Commissioner were assembled from fish guts, roundly booed the entire parade route, and tossed into the ocean at the end. This parade also marked the first day of the {{CTeam|BPT}} season.
+{{BaltimoreDeclaresWarFragment}}
 ==Declaration of War==