User:Ch4zm/July 2025/Boylston Lore Jam

Alewife-Boylston Rivalry

motto

BB: Ex Medio Omnia

Translation: "From the Center, Everything."

AA: Ex finibus ignis

Translation: "From the Ends, Fire."

alewife originals

The Pirate Radio Jam: In a pivotal match for the MTA Crown, the Boogers, appalled by the low-fidelity nature of the Arsonists' fan culture, attempted to "jam" The Brakeman's pirate radio signal. They didn't use technology; they broadcasted a live, avant-garde poetry reading on the same frequency. The plan backfired spectacularly. The discordant noise and abstract imagery of the poetry only fed the Arsonists' chaotic gestalt, causing their patterns to evolve in beautiful, terrifyingly unpredictable ways, leading to an infamous victory known to Alewife fans as "The Howl."

An Echo of Shared Trauma: Their linked origin in the great 90s blackout defines their interactions. The Arsonists were born of heat and rage in a stalled train. The Boogers were born of cold and dread in a damp tunnel. When they play, this polarity manifests on the grid. Arsonist patterns raise the metaphysical "temperature" of the game, causing opponents' patterns to become brittle. Booger patterns generate a "dampness," causing opponents to become sluggish and bogged down in a virtual slime.

The "Cartographical Defamation": The modern rivalry’s "First Burn" was not ignited by a match, but by a mosaic. In a grand act of civic arrogance, the Boylston Boogers unveiled a massive, permanent tile map in their station. Commissioned from Bartholomew Peabody Finch, a celebrated (and notoriously smug) artist from Wellesley, the piece was a masterpiece of passive aggression. It depicted the Green Line as a thick, vibrant artery of emerald and gold tile, pulsing with life. In stark contrast, the Red Line was rendered as a thin, pathetic capillary of cracked crimson ceramic that withered and fizzled into a gray, featureless smudge at Alewife. This public insult, the "Cartographical Defamation," was the moment the "GO BACK TO WELLESLEY!" chant was first spat in fury.

alewife lore

• GO BACK TO WELLESLEY
• The Cartographic Defamation
• The Wellesley Heresy
• War of the Pothole
• Coattail Pennant
• Rainbow Burn

boylston lore

• The Cartographic Defamation

Goober Boylston (no relation) is an architecture critic for the Boston Tribune and the unofficial spokesperson for the Boylston Boogers. Goober primarily writes sports columns for the Boston Tribune, but insists that "architecture critic" is his "real" title.

mta crown backstory

The Architectural Heresy: The rivalry is an aesthetic holy war. Boylston, one of the oldest stations, is a landmark of historic tile and wrought iron. Alewife is a modern (1985) concrete cathedral of Brutalism. The Boogers see Alewife as a soulless, monstrous parking garage with a subway attached. The Arsonists see Boylston as a cramped, crumbling, inefficient relic for tourists. This feud exploded when a Booger-sympathizing architecture critic called Alewife "a monument to despair," and in retaliation, the Arsonists' patterns began mimicking the cracks in Boylston's ancient tilework, a deep and personal insult.

End of the Line vs. Center of the Universe: This is the core of their philosophical divide. The Arsonists are "End-of-the-Liners," their identity forged at the terminal point where the city frays into swampland. Their patterns start at the grid's edge and burn inward. The Boogers, whose station opens onto the Boston Common, are "Centrists" who believe they are the hub of existence. Their patterns emerge in the center and expand outward, often collapsing when they touch the "unimportant" edges of the grid.

Hellmouth Cup

Season 14

The First Miracle: The flip side of the Arsonists story about The Cartographic Defamation is the Boylston Boogers doing what they do so well: getting under their cross-town rivals' skin and getting into their heads, living there rent-free throughout the pre-season, regular season, and postseason. The Boogers flawlessly executed a campaign of psychological warfare designed to set the tone.

The Boogers couldn't believe their luck when they landed their dream matchup against the Arsonists in their first season of existence. The Arsonists, who had already been in existence for 14 seasons of the Hellmouth Cup and know the Boogers when the Boogers were still in grade school, resented the matchup and saw it as an insult - they were a major league team, being forced to match up against a troupe of minor leaguers, in their first year of existence, on the biggest stage. They resented the Boogers because the Boogers had successfully gotten into their heads.

That's exactly how the Boogers ended up winning the first-ever postseason matchup between the two bitter rivals, lighting the match of the bitterest rivalry in Golly.

Season 23

The Ghost Run and The Sauna

Season 23: The Ghost Run: The Boylston Boogers had been not just beaten but swept by the Delaware Corporate Shells in their Season 15 postseason exit, so the Boogers came prepared this time. They tapped into an unusual source of power for their Division Series match: the abandoned outer track at Boylston station. Legend says the collective reactivated dormant, chaotic automata left decaying in those tunnels since the station's opening in 1897. They unleashed unpredictable "ghost train" spaceships that the hyper-focused Shells never noticed until it was too late. It was a dangerous gamble that paid off for Boylston, drawing on the city's forgotten underbelly to power through the Shells.

The Boogers' ghost train spaceship magic continued against the Albuquerque Solarpunks , another recent Hellmouth Cup expansion team that had shown great promise in their early years, only to be bushwhacked by the ghost train spaceship patterns that Boylston let loose (or rather, that let themselves loose, as Boylston no longer had control of the spirits driving the ghost trains). The high-and-dry Punks were swamped.

Season 23: The Sauna: The championship victory against the Long Beach Flightless Birds was not clean. Both teams agreed ahead of time to hold the match in a sauna, allowing the Boogers to tap into their natural "moist" aura, while giving the Flightless Birds the chance to smooth talk their way around the Boogers and to a Hellmouth Cup. The Boogers, thriving int he damp, high-pressure environment, were a slippery opponent, but so were the slick Birds - known throughout the league for their fast thinking and smooth talking, it was nearly impossible to corner them.

But as the series wore on, the air grew thick, the patterns slowed, and the Flightless Birds were too waterlogged to go on. The Boogers didn't outplay them, they seeped into every crack in their defenses, a victory of pervasive dampness that was both triumphant and vaguely unsettling - like finding mold in a beautiful painting.

Toroidal Cup

TCS: S4: BB > LBFB

Season 4: Winds of Fate: (Maximum Double Choke bringing the Birds and Boogers together)

Season 4: Boylston Tide: The first and only Toroidal Cup victory of the Boogers happened in Toroidal/Season 4. It was remembered by the Boogers as a dirty victory, and by the Birds as a bucket of cold water soaking them to the bone. Legend has it that Boylston embraced their "MOIST" power word, propelled themselves into semi-liquid and unpredictable tide formations, and eventually overpowered the Flightless Birds. A messy 7-game series was back-and-forth, back-and-forth, ending with a desperate Game 7 gambit by Boylston that saw them grab the lead and never look back. The Boogers clinched a wet and sticky victory that Goober Boylston rambled on about for nearly 5,000 words in the next day's newspaper column.

TCS: S8: War of the Pothole

AA: War of the Pothole

TCS: S11: heist, LBFB > BB

Season 11: The Tides of Long Beach: In a Cup series rematch that was quickly becoming popular, the Birds and Boogers faced off in another Cup series in Toroidal/Season 11. Determined to spoil the potential rematch of the first-ever Hellmouth Cup series (Birds vs Boat Shoes), the Boogers powered past the Boat Shoes to clinch the pennant and face off against the Flightless Birds.

The Boogers came in hot, trouncing the Flightless Birds in 3 straight games. It was even rumored that after Game 3, the Boogers began to clear space on the shelf of the team clubhouse where the Toroidal/Season 11 Cup would go. But the Flightless Birds bounced back, digging deep in Game 4 to come away with the victory. Three Triple Doubles later, the series was all tied up.

Game 7 of the Toroidal/Season 11 was as short as it was stunning. The Birds hit hard out of the gate, grabbed the lead, and made short work of the Boogers. Far from the Game 7 vibe the crowd was expecting, the match was practically over before most fans were in their seats. By the end of the match, Birds fans were flocking onto the field, while Boogers fans (who could not watch the game live due to local blackout restrictions) would learn of the disastrous Game 7 the next day in Goober Boylston's newspaper column.

Season 14: Boogers-Birds Double Denial: Toroidal/Season 14 saw the tantalizing possibility of another Birds-Boogers matchup, with the Birds facing off against the Animals and the Boogers facing the Corporate Shells. But in a dose of double disappointment, both Birds and Boogers were knocked out.

TCS: S15/S17: #1 Seed Collapse

Season 15: #1 Seed Collapse: While the Toroidal/Season 15 Hot League Division Series will live in infamy thanks to The 159-158 Game, across the league the Boogers and Grape Chews were having a consequential Division Series matchup of their own. The Boogers, who were known throughout the league for bragging about their Toroidal/Season 4 Cup, as well as the near-miss of their Toroidal/Season 11 series loss, had come in as the #1 seed expecting to crush the Grape Chews. Their formations were too cute by half, and their arrogance led them to attempt overly ornate patterns that couldn't be controlled. The Chews ended up dispatching the Boogers in Game 4, teaching the Boogers a lesson about hubris.

Season 17: #1 Seed Collapse: In Toroidal/Season 17 the Boogers faced off against the Flamingos, and it became clear to everyone that the Boogers had learned no lessons about hubris. The Boogers continued to brag about their Toroidal/Season 4 Cup, their Toroidal/Season 11 near-miss, and even began bragging about how lucky the Grape Chews had been to pull off their Toroidal/Season 15 victory over the Boogers.

The Boogers quickly notched a 2-game lead over the Flamingos. But it was the last time they would hold the lead in a game. In a rapid 3-game set, the Flamingos diced the boogers into bits, including a whirlwind Game 5 where they whipped Boylston and only needed the minimum number of generations to do it.

TCS: S14: False Hope (BB > SFBS, DECO > BB)

TCS: S20: Exhaustion (ORL)

Rainbow Cup

AA:

• Coattail Pennant
• Rainbow Burn

etc.

BB-SFBS-LBFB:

• HCS S23 (BB beat the ABQ in pennant, they faced the LBFB)
• HCS S24 (BB lost to SFBS in pennant, they faced the LBFB)
• TCS S14 (BB beat the SFBS in pennant, they faced the LBFB)

BB-DET-LBFB:

• TCS S4 (BB beat DET in pennant, faced LBFB)
• KCS S24 (BB beat DET in pennant, faced LBFB)