User:Ch4zm/December 2022/Golly Lore Fragments

Pattern

Fragments Pattern for Lore

Write the text once in a template, and include it on relevant pages.

Example: {{PianoTunersHackingScandalFragment}}

Fragments Wrtiting Procedure

Procedure:

• narratives are for linking teams together, generally
• write narrative out on respective team's page. just write.
• once it is roughly done, split whole thing into one or more lore fragments
• maintain a master list of the lore fragments
• once finished turning it into templates on the original page, include the templates on other relevant pages

Tag all fragments with:

Category:Lore Fragments

Tag with relevant cup:

Category:Hellmouth Cup Lore, Category:Toroidal Cup Lore, etc.

Tag with relevant teams, details, etc:

Category:Midwest Love Triangle

All included at end between "noinclude" tags"

SAC

Hellmouth Cup

Season 4/Sacramento Boot Lickers Bankruptcy -> {{BootLickersSeason4BankruptcySummaryFragment}}

Season 4:

• Season 4 Day 25 game against DET - one point
• Transformed themselves into the team of destiny
• Origin of team slogans that are nonsensical self-help mumbo jumbo
• Visualize Your Power!
• Transmogrify Your Self Manifestation!
• (scrolling tickers)

{{BootLickersVisualizeYourPower}}

SDBA

The history of the San Diego Balloon Animals is a long and tragic tale of a team traumatized by defeat, tantalized by the taste of revenge, and aching to bring justice to the teams that wronged them.

In the Hellmouth Cup, The Animals had an early strong showing, but knocked up against a stronger Tucson Butchers team in the postseason and were knocked out a couple of times. In the S6 postseason, the #1 seeded Animals swept the Baltimore Texas and Ft. Worth Piano Tuners , reaching the Hellmouth Cup for the first (and last) time. In the Hellmouth Cup series, they lost to the San Francisco Boat Shoes juggernaut, only winning 1 game out of 5. The Boat Shoes were making their third postseason appearance.

Despite a string of postseason appearances in S14, S16, and S18 ("even year magic"), the Animals were eliminated from the postseason each time, and sputtered into the final season of the Hellmouth Cup. The Animals tanked in Season 24, posting one of the worst single-season performances in Hellmouth Cup history. (See {{HellmouthRankList_SeasonAllTime}})

In the Toroidal Cup the Animals bounced back and had a nearly flawless postseason run in S1 of the Toroidal Cup. The Animals faced off against the Delaware Corporate Shells in the first-ever Toroidal CUp series. The Animals battled it out with the Shells for 7 games, but fizzled out in the final Game 7, blowing a chance at winning the franchise's first Cup series. After their S1 loss, the Animals lost their postseason confidence. In their 7 postseason appearances over the next 11 seasons, the Animals were eliminated 7 times.

The Animals finally got revenge with a Toroidal Cup series over the Delaware Corporate Shells in S14 of the Toroidal Cup. But in Toroidal/Season 19 and Toroidal/Season 22 the Animals fell to the Albuquerque Solarpunks in the Toroidal Cup series, leaving a pair of humiliating battle scars and leading to a new, bitter rivalry between the Balloon Animals and the Punks.

In S24 the Animals made it to the Toroidal Cup, but lost to one of the youngest franchises in the league, the Vegas Vampires .

The Rainbow Cup saw the Animals gain their revenge over the Punks, edging them out by just a few rainbows in the S15 Rainbow Cup series to capture first place. This was their only championship of the Rainbow Cup.

In the Klein Cup, the Animals consistently delivered disappointment to their fans as they failed to make a single appearance in a Cup Series over the course of 24 seasons. Tensions between the Animals and Punks, after the Punks switched from the Hot League to the Cold League, ran particularly high throughout the Klein Cup. Fans of the Balloon Animals became universally convinced the team was cursed.

In the Hellmouth II Cup, the Balloon Animals went another 23 seasons without winning a pennant. They finally reached their first Cup series in Hellmouth II/Season 24, only to lose to Fargo Flea Flickers in 6 games. The curse continued.

SLC

Hellmouth Cup

Join expansion league...

Toroidal Cup

entire Little League team trailing them everywhere

The Little Eddies

SS

Rainbow

narrowly missed a flawless dynasty under extraordinarily difficult circumstances

spoiled by SGE - photobombed

OSHA

Hellmouth Cup

The Curse of the Silly Goat refers to a curse that affected the Jersey OSHA Violations for the first 48 seasons of their existence, the entirety of the Hellmouth Cup and Toroidal Cup.

The Jersey OSHA Violations stadium was built on the site of a former petting zoo. The main attraction at the former petting zoo was a theoretical, non-Euclidean goat, which was purely conceptual. However, when the petting zoo was shut down, the goat was never set loose, and when the stadium was built on the site, the perturbed non-Euclidean goat spirit began to cause "goat in the machine" glitches during matches. These tended to strike the OSHA Violations at their most crucial moments, creating a long string of heartbreaks.

The curse was finally broken in Rainbow/Season 1, for reasons that are still poorly understood.

Curse removal theories include:

• The Möbius Fence: A 14-year-old fan of both the OSHA Violations and the philosopher Martin Heidegger published a research paper with a mathematical proof that a "conceptual goat" could be pacified by the "concept" of a three-sided fence. During Rainbow Cup postseason matches at the OSHA Violations stadium, several fans positioned themselves at mathematically precise focal points around the arena. One fan held a sign saying "This is one side of the fence." The second held up another sign that said "This is the second side of the fence." The third held up a sign that said "This is the final side of the fence." The conceptual fence, which may have been missing a side, or may have had an extra side, trapped the conceptual "goat in the machine" in the machine, and the paradox rendered it unable to interfere with matches, allowing the OSHA Violations to finally win.

• Goat's Goodbye: Spotting an opportunity to break the curse early in Season 1 of the Rainbow Cup, the team hired a Goat Trainer to work with the non-Euclidean goat and develop several "trick plays" that would utilize the goat. It is speculated that the OSHA Violations practiced these trick plays repeatedly throughout the season, all while maintaining a protocol of absolute secrecy. In the final seconds of the final match of the Rainbow Cup series, the OSHA Violations attempted to execute their trick play to outmaneuver the Mobile Wheels , which would have failed because the haunted spirit of the non-Euclidean silly goat had disappeared sometime during the final match, except the OSHA Violations executed it incorrectly, which caused the trick play to succeed. Commotion broke out on the grid, and when the dust had settled, the OSHA Violations had clinched the Rainbow Cup by a single Rainbow. - Curse of the Silly Goat

{{JerseyCourageFragment}} - Jersey Courage

DECO OSHA alliance?

ORL

Hellmouth Cup

(already a bunch of fragments written)

{{MajorsHellmouthEarlySuccessDisillusionmentFragment}}, {{MajorsSeason17SpringBreakFragment}}, {{MajorsSeason1819SpringBreakFragment}}, {{MajorsSeason22ReturnToFormFragment}}

MILF

Triple X, Second Valentines Day Series, The Lovers Embrace

Hellmouth

The Lovers Embrace, midwest love triangle, everything here is pretty well-documented

Triple X

{{Navbox hellmouth history}}

Toroidal

Toroidal/Season 10 and Toroidal/Season 17 featured meetups, call out on {{Navbox toroidal history}} (same w triple X)

Go Ahead MF Make My Day

Logo idea:

(banner script) Go ahead

MF

(banner script) Make my day

Packer Hurtstick

Milwaukee Flamingos coach/manager

First "person" being introduced

Don't have to weave it into everything

Build a table of managers for each team. Some stay on, some change teams, some leave, some retire

SFBS and LBFB

Cali to NY

This makes SFBS-LBFB (surf and turf) like Dodgers-Yankees, but also Dodgers-Giants in reverse

San Francisco to the Bronx: Bronx Boat Shoes

San Francisco Boat Shoes -> Bronx Boat Shoes

Long Beach to Brooklyn: Brooklyn Flightless Birds

Long Beach Flightless Birds -> Brooklyn Flightless Birds