Season 3/Fixing Scandal
The Golly Season 3 Fixing Scandal was a scandal that happened after the Season 3 Hellmouth Cup between the San Francisco Boat Shoes and the Elko Astronauts, which the San Francisco Boat Shoes won in 7 games.
Timeline of Fixing Scandal
Initial Controversy
During the Season 3 League Division Series and League Championship Series, several tweets of photographs of Hellmouth Community College instructors driving expensive splorts cars around downtown Hellmouth went viral, with many splorts fans raising uncomfortable questions about how community college instructors could afford such lavish vehicles on such a small salary.
Rumors of a postseason fix began to spread across Golly fandom, and the resulting unrest and turmoil eclipsed the Boat Shoes' Hellmouth Cup victory.
Alleged Coverup
Following rumors of a postseason fix, the Golly Front Office Twitter account tweeted that several games from the Season 3 Hellmouth Cup (formerly known as the World Series) had disappeared, and that the Back Office was working on "a fix." This further fueled speculation that the fix was in for the World Series.
Shortly after this tweet, the Front Office sent another tweet reporting that the problem had been resolved. Because the tweet did not explicitly deny that the games were fixed, the tweet was widely seen as confirmation that the fix was in, and tantamount to a confession from the Golly Commissioner. Thus, the tweet claiming the problem had been resolved ended up triggering a new wave of lawsuits.
Resulting Lawsuits
The scandal rapidly spiraled out of control over the course of the seven games of the Hellmouth Cup, with the Golly offices attempting damage control even as new evidence was being uncovered and new lawsuits against the Golly offices were being announced.
In the end, there were a tangle of lawsuits:
- The Elko Astronauts sued the Golly offices for damages and emotional distress due to being forced to lose the Golly Hellmouth Cup on a national stage, humiliating the town of Elko
- The Elko City Council filed a lawsuit against the Golly offices and against the San Francisco Boat Shoes for damages and lost tourism revenue to the city
- The Golly offices sued the San Francisco Boat Shoes, mostly as a preemptive action to make it look like any lawsuit the Boat Shoes filed against the Golly offices was in response to that lawsuit
- The San Francisco Boat Shoes sued the Golly offices for damages due to the taint of scandal on their team's first Hellmouth Cup victory
- The Golly Commissioner's Office filed a lawsuit against the Golly Back Office for damages
- The Golly Back Office filed a counter-suit claiming wrongful termination
- Every team in Golly except for the San Francisco Boat Shoes filed a lawsuit against the San Francisco Boat Shoes over merchandise that marketed the San Francisco Boat Shoes as the Golly champions, without any asterisk present on the merchandise
- The Detroit Grape Chews tried to file a lawsuit against the Golly Commissioner so that they could show up in court and start a fistfight with the Commissioner, but the legal paperwork was all filled out with purple crayon so it was thrown out (only blue or black crayon is allowed in Hellmouth courts of law)
- Accidental Dismemberment, celebrity trial lawyer and lead legal counsel for the Jersey OSHA Violations, took advantage of the situation to file a lawsuit on behalf of the Golly Players Union, suing for the right for players to retire and alleging breach of contract on behalf of Golly, as related to the ongoing fixing scandal
