Baltimore Piano Tuners

Baltimore Piano Tuners
"Cheaters Get What Cheaters Deserve!"
Team Information
Name Baltimore Piano Tuners Abbreviation BPT Primary Color #3e92cc Logo    Hometown Baltimore Emoji Status Active
Rivalry Crowns
None
Favorites
Divination
Motto
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The Baltimore Piano Tuners are a Golly team from Baltimore, Marlyand. They are the offspring of the Cancel Texas Memo and are the humiliated husk of a former team that used to be known, at one time, as the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners but are now known as the most pathetic pack of cheating losers who ever played a splort. The Baltimore Piano Tuners joined the Golly league in Toroidal/Season 21, and continued on into the Rainbow league in Rainbow/Season 1.

The Piano Tuners Hacking Scandal was a scandal that struck the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners like a bolt of lightning in Toroidal/Season 16. The Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were unmasked as a pack of cheaters who weren't happy with winning championships the old-fashioned way; they had hacked the engineering division to win the Toroidal/Season 15 championship over the Boot Lickers and were attempting to beat the Boot Lickers again in Toroidal/Season 16. But, as a result of their hubris, they were not only eviscerated by the Sacramento Boot Lickers in the Toroidal/Season 16 Toroidal Cup series, they were also punished by the Cancel Texas Memo at the end of Toroidal/Season 20, which forced the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners to take on the team colors and hometown of their most hated rival, the Baltimore Texas , who were incinerated for being incapable of winning a single pennant in 44 seasons, despite countless opportunities.

Baltimore Golly fans, who are widely known as the most polite and civil fans in the entire Golly league, will often shower the Piano Tuners team with garbage, both when the Tuners walk out onto the field, and in the middle of games. The term "Baltimore Piano Tuners fan" is considered an oxymoron, because every Golly fan in Baltimore was raised from childhood to be a diehard Baltimore Texas fan, and to hate the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners with every ounce of their being (as part of the bitter Texas Crown rivalry). Thus, there is no team that Baltimore despises more than its home team, the Baltimore Piano Tuners .

The Piano Tuners perform significantly better during away games, thanks to the lack of garbage being thrown at them and the resulting increased visibility.

Team Character

The Piano Tuners are a pack of cheaters who got what was coming to them. What else can be said?

There is, however, one tiny glimmer of hope working in the Piano Tuners' favor, which is that they are in the same Rainbow Cup division as the Detroit Grape Chews , the only team that is an active Choke Artist (has never made it to a single championship series, ever, like, ever. Zero pennants. Zilch. Nada.)

Season by Season Summary

Rainbow Cup Summary

• In Rainbow/Season 1 the Baltimore Piano Tuners were the #4 seed in the Unwest League. They were knocked out in the Unwest League Championship Series by the Mobile Wheels and the Jersey OSHA Violations .
• In Rainbow/Season 5 the Baltimore Piano Tuners were the #2 seed in the Unwest League. They were knocked out in the Unwest League Championship Series by the Fargo Flea Flickers and the Louisville Illusionists .
• In Rainbow/Season 10 the Baltimore Piano Tuners were the #3 seed in the Unwest League. They were knocked out in the Unwest League Championship Series by the Boylston Boogers and the Delaware Corporate Shells .