User:Ch4zm/August 2025/Tucson Butchers

Tucson Butchers
"BONES FLESH TEETH"
Team Information
Name Tucson Butchers Abbreviation TB Nickname The Butchers, Bloodletters Primary Color #bb0000 Logo    Hometown Tucson, AZ Stadium The Meat Locker Emoji 🥩 Status Married to
Rivalry Crowns
Midwest Love Triangle          Salton Sea Crown    Cactus Crown
Favorites
Mixtape 🥩Tucson🥩Butchers🥩 Integer 7 Movie American Psycho
Divination
Element Water Power Word Blood Card 7♦
Motto
Si vis pacem, para bellum (If you want peace, prepare for war)
Template:Infobox team   •   edit

The Tucson Butchers are a Golly team from Tucson, Arizona. They spend most of their day in their butcher shop, surrounded by flesh and blood, although it is rarely open. The shop is famous for its wide selection of sausages, and for mysterious occurrences around the shop (large pools of blood appearing in the street, strange noises emanating from the basement, etc.). If you ask locals about any of these occurrences, they will laugh it off cheerfully, then tail you conspicuously until you leave town.

While they are best known for their craven bloodlust and frenzied formations on the Golly grid, the Butchers are quiet and mysterious. The Butchers and Milwaukee Flamingos fell deeply and instantly in love during the Season 9 Hellmouth Cup (Valentine's Day), which led to the formation of the Midwest Love Triangle. The Tucson Butchers are happily married to the Milwaukee Flamingos.

The Butchers are famous for their excellent and diverse taste in music. The Butchers were the first Golly team to drop a Mixtape, hosting a mixtape drop party, and its instant success led other teams to start their own mixtape and drop party traditions.

Hellmouth Cup

Tucson in the Hellmouth Cup Season by Season

Performance Chart

Summary

{{HellmouthRankList SeasonAllTime Chron TB}}

• In Season 1 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the San Diego Balloon Animals 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Long Beach Flightless Birds 2-3.
• In Season 2 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Elko Astronauts 1-3.
• In Season 3 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the San Diego Balloon Animals 2-3.
• In Season 5 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Baltimore Texas 1-3.
• In Season 7 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners 2-3.
• In Season 8 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They were swept in the Cold League Division Series by the Baltimore Texas .
• In Season 9 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Jersey OSHA Violations 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by sweeping the Long Beach Flightless Birds 3-0 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They lost the Hellmouth Cup Series to the Milwaukee Flamingos , 1-4.
• In Season 10 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Elko Astronauts 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by sweeping the Long Beach Flightless Birds 3-0 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They lost the Hellmouth Cup Series to the Milwaukee Flamingos , 3-4.
• In Season 15 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners 2-3.
• In Season 20 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Long Beach Flightless Birds 1-3.
• In Season 23 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Long Beach Flightless Birds 2-3.
• In Season 24 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They swept the Phoenix Freshrolls 3-0 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Salt Lake Turbulence 1-3.

Toroidal Cup

Tucson in the Toroidal Cup Season by Season

Chart

Summary

{{ToroidalRankList SeasonAllTime Chron TB}}

• In Toroidal/Season 4 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Long Beach Flightless Birds 1-3.
• In Toroidal/Season 7 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They swept the Elko Astronauts 3-0 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Salt Lake Turbulence 3-2 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They became Toroidal Cup champions by defeating the Sacramento Boot Lickers 4-3.
• In Toroidal/Season 8 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Salt Lake Turbulence 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners 3-2 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They became Toroidal Cup champions by defeating the Alewife Arsonists 4-1.
• In Toroidal/Season 10 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Elko Astronauts 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Jersey OSHA Violations 3-1 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They lost the Toroidal Cup Series to the Milwaukee Flamingos , 2-4.
• In Toroidal/Season 16 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Long Beach Flightless Birds 2-3.
• In Toroidal/Season 17 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Phoenix Freshrolls 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Baltimore Texas 3-2 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They lost the Toroidal Cup Series to the Milwaukee Flamingos , 2-4.
• In Toroidal/Season 19 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They were swept in the Cold League Division Series by the San Diego Balloon Animals .
• In Toroidal/Season 22 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Baltimore Piano Tuners 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the San Diego Balloon Animals 2-3.
• In Toroidal/Season 23 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Salt Lake Turbulence 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Long Beach Flightless Birds 3-2 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They lost the Toroidal Cup Series to the Albuquerque Solarpunks , 3-4.
• In Toroidal/Season 24 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Phoenix Freshrolls 2-3.

Rainbow Cup

Tucson in the Rainbow Cup Season by Season

Performance Chart

Summary

{{RainbowRankList SeasonAllTime Chron TB}}

• In Rainbow/Season 6 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the West League.
  • They were knocked out in the West League Championship Series by the Grand Junction Conjunctions and the Seattle Sneakers .
• In Rainbow/Season 11 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the West League.
  • They clinched the pennant in the West League Championship Series by coming in first place ahead of the Vegas Vampires .
  • They came in second in the Rainbow Cup Series, accumulating 52🌈 to finish 9🌈 behind the first-place Mobile Wheels .
• In Rainbow/Season 13 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the West League.
  • They were knocked out in the West League Championship Series by the Sacramento Boot Lickers and the Vegas Vampires .
• In Rainbow/Season 14 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the West League.
  • They were knocked out in the West League Championship Series by the Long Beach Flightless Birds and the Grand Junction Conjunctions .
• In Rainbow/Season 19 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the West League.
  • They clinched the pennant in the West League Championship Series by coming in first place ahead of the Grand Junction Conjunctions .
  • They came in second in the Rainbow Cup Series, accumulating 57🌈 to finish 6🌈 behind the first-place Sugar Grove Eavesdroppers .
• In Rainbow/Season 21 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the West League.
  • They were knocked out in the West League Championship Series by the Salt Lake Turbulence and the Sacramento Boot Lickers .
• In Rainbow/Season 22 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the West League.
  • They were knocked out in the West League Championship Series by the Grand Junction Conjunctions and the San Francisco Boat Shoes .

Klein Cup

Tucson in the Klein Cup Season by Season

Performance Chart

Summary

{{KleinRankList SeasonAllTime Chron TB}}

• In Klein/Season 1 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the San Diego Balloon Animals 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Seattle Sneakers 4-1 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They became Klein Cup champions by defeating the Milwaukee Flamingos 4-1.
• In Klein/Season 2 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the San Diego Balloon Animals 2-3.
• In Klein/Season 8 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They swept the Seattle Sneakers 3-0 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Salt Lake Turbulence 4-2 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They lost the Klein Cup Series to the Jersey OSHA Violations , 1-4.
• In Klein/Season 13 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Albuquerque Solarpunks 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Salt Lake Turbulence 3-4.
• In Klein/Season 17 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Seattle Sneakers 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Baltimore Piano Tuners 4-2 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They swept the Sugar Grove Eavesdroppers 4-0 to became Klein Cup champions.
• In Klein/Season 21 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Seattle Sneakers 2-3.
• In Klein/Season 22 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Long Beach Flightless Birds 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Sacramento Boot Lickers 4-2 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They swept the Delaware Corporate Shells 4-0 to became Klein Cup champions.
• In Klein/Season 23 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Baltimore Piano Tuners 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Seattle Sneakers 1-4.
• In Klein/Season 24 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Baltimore Piano Tuners 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Long Beach Flightless Birds 3-4.

Hellmouth II Cup

Tucson in the Hellmouth II Cup

Performance Chart

Summary

{{HellmouthIIRankList SeasonAllTime Chron TB}}

• In Hellmouth II/Season 3 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Sacramento Boot Lickers 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Baltimore Piano Tuners 1-4.
• In Hellmouth II/Season 4 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Baltimore Piano Tuners 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the San Diego Balloon Animals 4-3 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They swept the Jersey OSHA Violations 4-0 to became Hellmouth II Cup champions.
• In Hellmouth II/Season 6 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Sacramento Boot Lickers 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Salt Lake Turbulence 4-3 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They swept the Jersey OSHA Violations 4-0 to became Hellmouth II Cup champions.
• In Hellmouth II/Season 10 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Albuquerque Solarpunks 1-3.
• In Hellmouth II/Season 11 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Baltimore Piano Tuners 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Phoenix Freshrolls 4-2 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They lost the Hellmouth II Cup Series to the Boylston Boogers , 3-4.
• In Hellmouth II/Season 12 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Phoenix Freshrolls 1-3.
• In Hellmouth II/Season 13 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Albuquerque Solarpunks 2-3.
• In Hellmouth II/Season 14 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Long Beach Flightless Birds 1-3.
• In Hellmouth II/Season 17 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Seattle Sneakers 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Long Beach Flightless Birds 4-1 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They became Hellmouth II Cup champions by defeating the San Francisco Boat Shoes 4-2.
• In Hellmouth II/Season 18 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They were swept in the Cold League Division Series by the Seattle Sneakers .
• In Hellmouth II/Season 19 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Seattle Sneakers 2-3.
• In Hellmouth II/Season 22 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the San Diego Balloon Animals 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They were swept in the Cold League Championship Series by the Phoenix Freshrolls .
• In Hellmouth II/Season 24 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They were swept in the Cold League Division Series by the Phoenix Freshrolls .

Hellmouth III Cup

Tucson in the Hellmouth III Cup Season by Season

Performance Chart

Summary

{{HellmouthIIIRankList SeasonAllTime Chron TB}}

• In Hellmouth III/Season 1 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Seattle Sneakers 2-3.
• In Hellmouth III/Season 4 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Sacramento Boot Lickers 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Long Beach Flightless Birds 4-3 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They lost the Hellmouth III Cup Series to the Delaware Corporate Shells , 2-4.
• In Hellmouth III/Season 5 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Sacramento Boot Lickers 1-3.
• In Hellmouth III/Season 8 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Phoenix Freshrolls 2-3.
• In Hellmouth III/Season 13 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Albuquerque Solarpunks 2-3.
• In Hellmouth III/Season 15 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Sacramento Boot Lickers 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Long Beach Flightless Birds 2-4.
• In Hellmouth III/Season 16 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Long Beach Flightless Birds 2-3.
• In Hellmouth III/Season 22 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They were swept in the Cold League Division Series by the Salt Lake Turbulence .

Hellmouth IV Cup

Tucson in the Hellmouth IV Cup

Performance Chart

Summary

{{HellmouthIVRankList SeasonAllTime Chron TB}}

• In Hellmouth IV/Season 1 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Salt Lake Turbulence 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Phoenix Freshrolls 2-4.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 3 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Sacramento Boot Lickers 2-3.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 4 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Elko Astronauts 1-3.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 9 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Long Beach Flightless Birds 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the San Diego Balloon Animals 2-4.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 10 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Baltimore Texas II 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Salt Lake Turbulence 1-4.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 14 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They swept the Salt Lake Turbulence 3-0 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Baltimore Texas II 4-2 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They lost the Hellmouth IV Cup Series to the Sugar Grove Eavesdroppers , 1-4.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 16 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They swept the San Diego Balloon Animals 3-0 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by defeating the Albuquerque Solarpunks 4-2 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They became Hellmouth IV Cup champions by defeating the Jersey OSHA Violations 4-3.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 17 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Elko Astronauts 2-3.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 19 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the San Diego Balloon Animals 1-3.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 20 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Phoenix Freshrolls 1-3.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 21 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Sacramento Boot Lickers 3-2 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They clinched the pennant by sweeping the Baltimore Texas II 4-0 in the Cold League Championship Series.
  • They lost the Hellmouth IV Cup Series to the Jersey OSHA Violations , 1-4.
• In Hellmouth IV/Season 23 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the San Diego Balloon Animals 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Long Beach Flightless Birds 3-4.

Hellmouth V Cup

Tucson in the Hellmouth V Cup

Performance Chart

Summary

{{HellmouthVRankList SeasonAllTime Chron TB}}

• In Hellmouth V/Season 3 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Salt Lake Turbulence 2-3.
• In Hellmouth V/Season 7 the Tucson Butchers were the #3 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Albuquerque Solarpunks 1-3.
• In Hellmouth V/Season 9 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Elko Astronauts 2-3.
• In Hellmouth V/Season 10 the Tucson Butchers were the #2 seed in the Cold League.
  • They were swept in the Cold League Division Series by the San Diego Balloon Animals .
• In Hellmouth V/Season 21 the Tucson Butchers were the #1 seed in the Cold League.
  • They defeated the Long Beach Flightless Birds 3-1 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They were swept in the Cold League Championship Series by the Albuquerque Solarpunks .
• In Hellmouth V/Season 22 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They lost the Cold League Division Series to the Salt Lake Turbulence 1-3.

Hellmouth VI Cup

Tucson in the Hellmouth VI Cup

Performance Chart

Summary

{{HellmouthVIRankList SeasonAllTime Chron TB}}

• In Hellmouth VI/Season 6 the Tucson Butchers were the #4 seed in the Cold League.
  • They swept the Baltimore Texas II 3-0 in the Cold League Division Series.
  • They lost the Cold League Championship Series to the Albuquerque Solarpunks 3-4.