Ft. Worth Piano Tuners

The Ft. Worth Piano Tuners are a Golly team from Ft. Worth, Texas. The Piano Tuners are known for their inability to keep a tune, hold a note, or keep time to even the most basic beat. They are also famous for being completely unaware of their own musical inabilities. Despite setting an as-yet unbroken record for most wins in a season (32) in Season 2, the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners are Partytime specialists, reaching partytime first in their league more often than any other team.

Ft. Worth Piano Tuners
"Tuned up!"
Team Information
Name Ft. Worth Piano Tuners Abbreviation FWPT Primary Color #ef6f6c Logo    Hometown Ft. Worth Emoji Status Active
Rivalry Crowns
None
Favorites
Divination
Motto
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History

The Ft. Worth Piano Tuners have been in the league since Season 1.

Prior to joining the Golly league as a professional splorts team, the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were previously known as the Dallas Piano Movers, a pick-up league of amateur Golly enthusiasts who played intramural games on weekends. When Golly was announced, the Piano Movers formed a franchise and moved to Ft. Worth, rebranding themselves as the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners.

A brief season-by-season summary:

• In Season 1 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners did not reach the postseason.
• In Season 2 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners had an historic winning season and entered the postseason as the #1 seed in the Cold League. They weere knocked out by their Texas Crown rivals the Baltimore Texas in the Cold League Division Series.
• In Season 3 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners did not reach the postseason.
• In Season 4 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the first to Partytime in the Cold League on Day 48.
• In Season 5 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the first to Partytime in the Cold League on Day 45.
• In Season 6 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the #2 seed in the Cold League. They were knocked out in the Cold League Championship Series by the San Diego Balloon Animals.
• In Season 7 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the #4 seed in the Cold League. They were knocked out in the Cold League Championship Series by the Long Beach Flightless Birds.
• In Season 8 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the first to Partytime on Day 45.
• In Season 9 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners did not reach the postseason.
• In Season 10 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the first to Partytime on Day 45, together with the San Diego Balloon Animals.
• In Season 11 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the #4 seed in the Cold League. They won the Cold League pennant and went on to win their first-ever Hellmouth Cup championship over the Alewife Arsonists.
• In Season 12 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the #4 seed in the Cold League. They were knocked out in the Cold League Division Series by the Baltimore Texas.
• In Season 13 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners did not make the playoffs.
• In Season 14 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the #3 seed in the Cold League. They won the Cold League pennant but lost in the Hellmouth Cup series to the Sacramento Boot Lickers.
• In Season 15 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the #3 seed in the Cold League. They won the Cold League pennant and went on to win the Hellmouth Cup series against the Delaware Corporate Shells.
• In Season 16 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners did not make the playoffs.
• In Season 17 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the #3 seed in the Cold League. They won the Cold League pennant but lost in the Hellmouth Cup series to the Orlando Business Majors.
• In Season 18 the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners were the first to Partytime on Day 47, together with the Tucson Butchers.

Team Fight Song

The Ft. Worth Piano Tuners selected the song "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" as their fight song during their historic Season 2 winning streak. The fan section of their home stadium began sinning the fight song during the playoffs, and to this day there are still some hungry, cold, and dedicated fans who live in the stadium and maintain round the clock vigils to finish the song. They have lost count approximately 27 times.

Party Animals

The Ft. Worth Piano Tuners have established themselves as the Party Animals of Golly, reaching Partytime more often than any other team.

Logo and Art

The Artists Union was commissioned to make a poster for the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners after their Season 14 League Division Series victory over the Baltimore Texas. Unfortunately, no one in the Artists Union was aware that no players on the Ft. Worth Piano Tuners have any musical talent whatsoever.

When the poster was unveiled to the team, most of them stood and stared at it, confused. A few asked what "sight reading" was. Fortunately no artists were present for the unveiling. It was a sordid affair all around.

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